MY BROTHER'S COMIN 2 PHX!

This is the first time both since I moved to Chandler, AZ that my older brother will be paying a visit. For a couple years we had talked about him coming out but he started a family and that put things on hold. When we were kids in Chicago, my brother was a huge Lakers fan and I was a huge Bulls fan (basketball of course). Sure enuff he won a lot of bragging rights in the 1980's but after they were defeated by my Bulls, he turned to his second team of David Robinson and the Spurs and mine was the Suns. Tonight the Suns and Spurs play and let the rivarly return in full force now that we are adults. Just like the Pistons did to the Bulls in the 1990's, the Spurs have done the same to my Suns but they will fall tonight!

I'm glad he's coming (even though his 1st born and my nephew and my sis-in-law couldn't make it) and I know the Love will be at the airport and after that, it's WAR!!! I purchased tix for the game in November and couldn't wait for this day to come. I miss my bro and I wish we could hang out more but I know I have to maximixe the time we'll have together so that it's memorable and long-lasting. Because he has a family now, we can't talk as much so when we do, it's awesome. I can't wait to show him the home I've found here in AZ and jut show him around so he can learn that there a water supply here in the valley.

My other brother and his family should be here on a later flight so I look forward to seeing them also. Having the time off to spend time with family and friends for some this week's festivities will be time well spent.

OPPOSITION

Took much time and few people to help me find,
Took more time and many people to make you lose.

Know that you can’t trace exactly what it is that keeps you down,
To search for where those difficult feelings lie is something you wouldn’t choose.

You asked to be sent a gifted child to help you better your life,
In return He sent you me...

Possessing everything you would ever want in someone special,
None of which you ever believed you could be...

So I tried to guide you on a path that leads to eternal peace,
A path that you’re not so sure you can walk...

Still crawling, too much surround sound of personal pressure,
Unable to talk...

Try to love you in ways that words can’t express,
Ways so secure that it comes with positive benefits...

I am then introduced to the love from you and your world,
One that has a variety of hidden rules and many unexplainable limits...

See in the world where I come from,
Everyone is treated as human beings and equals...

No one controls another or treats them like property,
Never intentionally trying to make past generation sequels...

In your world, because you were not given the kind of love you felt you deserve,
You would receive it from someone who had a lot to give...

Disregarding the fact that that person may need too,
While slowly trying to take away everything that made that person’s life easy to live...

Click here and it's the 7th page for the 2nd part of this excerpt

http://www.lulu.com/browse/preview.php?fCID=441817

BREAKING UP

Well we all know that New Year's has come and gone and with that comes that test to see if everyone is sticking to their New Year's resolution. Lose weight, stopping smoking/drinking, vacation more, etc... One thing that happens during New Year's is the process of elmination to better one's life. I used to use the New Year to reflect and then form challenges and make vows to improve and build from the previous year. Now that I am older, those challenges and vows I committed to manifested into a way of life and now I have to manage and maintain.

That's not the case for others I've interacted with. Every New Year I have always gotten phones calls because someone got dumped right around the New Year. The person that got dumped always never saw it coming but the more everything is disected and put on the table, the more red flags showed up. So if anyone is in an abusive relationship where your "bf" of "gf" gets some twisted pleasure in making you feel small or less than valued, walk away... Make sure that you do not carry the abusers momentum ansd legacy into the next relationship so that it doesn't have a chance to grow and then when New Year's come around, you are the one who gets dumped for the same reasons you dumped. Do not let these egotistical, self - centered, emotional and moral criminals near your Heart especially if you or your Heart isn't fully developed enough to be ready for battle and fight back.

Understand something, just because you walk away doesn't mean it's over. It means let the drama and the aftermath begin. Let the flowers begin, gifts begin, being sweet begin, the manipulation begin...again. Emotional criminals are repeat offenders and cannot change or grow up into the Man or Woman we hoped for down the road. I'm a whole and complete person so I don't want no goofy ass, incomplete, glass half empty, victim, and twisted/wounded person who's too weak to get over his/her past and his/her self.

Opposites may attract momentarily but compliments are everlasting...

I have written several about this matter but I'll share with you - Opposition

MLK

A special man and a special day that's dear to my Heart. I have friends from all sorts of backgrounds and we've found Love for each other in 2008 no matter what when down in the early 1900's and so on. I happened on some luck the day before MLK and felt like sharing. Some Phoenix Suns tix landed in my lap for a game I don't have in my ticket package and so I went and sat behind the bench of my team as they defeated the Nets. The game was fun, sat 11 rows behind Grant Hill and a section away from Steve Nash's wife and beautiful kids. What melted my Heart the most was the tribute to Dr. King from the suns organization and most importantly I learned that these great seats I had landed me 5 rows from Bill Russell - the 11 time NBA champion for the Celtics and huge part the MLK movement. What a way to celebrate MLK and I'm proud to be one of those who understood and embraced the message that "I Have A Dream" represented.

To Dr. King & family and all the members of the civil rights moment...Thank You.

WORKOUT PROGRAMS

I had someone give me their e-mail address so that I could e-mail a workout program to help get over laziness and lack of focus and motivation from starting something then stopping. Even though I'm fit and in good health, I'm not a personal trainer or nutritionist by no means. Here's my e-mail and I'll let you be the judge as to what I should have done.

"When I was younger, I got up at about 6am to meet 4 ladies at the gym b/c they said they needed some help. So instead of just putting together this workout program, I'll tell you what I shared with them. Sorry, but I don't have a workout plan that will help you get the body, endurance, or the energy you want. All I have is the drive, motive, and the will to shape myself into the best I can be whether it's physical or psychological. I'm also happy and at peace with myself which allows me to care about my well-being and make maintaining what I have NOT easy but natural and a big part of my life. Doing that makes stress, drama, or even laziness an illusion that I could never live by. I never wanted to be that person who never gave putting myself 1st and my health 1st a fair shot.

Maybe this is not what you wanted to hear but it's what I have to share. You are a big girl so you know what challenges lie in front of you should you choose to continue what you start and follow thru . You are a tall, lanky, lightly-skinned, beautiful red-headed woman (don't mean 2 offend) who has been blessed with a slender frame that doesn't need much work. Improving and building on top of what you already have has to start inside and you have to do it for you. I wish people could see what I see but in order to do that, you gotta work hard and enjoy the struggles that come your way. We all hit a wall, have bad days, things that don't go our way, that come with life's package. Being that fit or "sexy" or not as lazy person is a life commitment and is attainable if you are willing to grab it and never let go. It takes sacrifice(s)

That's my workout plan. Good Luck!!!"

Should I Have To Go...

Should I Have
To Go

I’ve spent many years
building on the perfect
foundation for you to
feel secure in with no
further worries.

You’ve already been
given what I will ever
have to offer.

When I’m chosen to
be taken to the other
place, I can
comfortably depart
knowing that your
happiness can continue
in my absence.

Remember.

Everything happens
for a reason.

Sometimes things are
better off unresolved.

Understand.

Whenever I go, I
won’t be alone.
I’ll also make sure to
leave you with
everything that enabled
me to be everything for you.

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY DAD!

For those who me know that I lost my Dad last year. Today is the anniversary of his passing and I was wondering how I was going to celebrate. My Dad loved Popeye's chicken, Red Lobster, and Ponderosa. Whenever we saw each other we had to have one or all three and that was cool with me. He also liked watching movies, sports, or just chit chatting. What people probably don't know is that when I was trying to save the money I needed to start publishing my book, he didn't hesitate and after he passed, my brothers and I had to clean his place and wouldn't you know it. On his nightstand lied the autographed copy of my book and pics of all of us that he looked at constantly before he turned in every night. When I was younger, the cars he got for me were HORRIBLE but whenever I needed something fixed, there he was. When he began to get sick every now and again before eventually passing, I made sure I was there. I made sure we had Popeye's, I made sure his shoes were fine, I even cut his toenails to relieve some of the pain because he couldn't reach his feet, I made sure we laughed until he choked, I sat next to him when he slept, and I made sure that no matter what his doubts were that he would know that I always Loved him beyond reason. I made sure to reinforce that to him so that when it was time for him to go, he would go knowing that True Love presented itself in the form of his baby son. I miss him so much but I feel him and that feeling keeps me wanting to challenge myself to take being positive to another level. As long as I am on the path I'll always have that feeling of him strong. I wrote 2 poems that can apply now to this post - Missed Is and Should I Have To Go

http://www.lulu.com/browse/preview.php?fCID=441817 to read Missed Is

A SIGN

There was a younger lady I also met under similar terms and her matter was that she (though very young) was giving up on the belief that Love even exist. She also had a kid very young also and wondered if she’s ever gonna find a good MAN one day. She also wondered why guys are always looking for somebody better that who they are with. [If an incomplete guy is with an incomplete girl then the best the two of them can be is incomplete] – Is what I told her. I believe this guy wanted to see her once or twice a week, see other people also but I don’t think he wanted her to see anyone else or maybe they both could. Maybe when she see’s this blog she’ll correct me. I checked my email it he doesn’t want her seeing anyone else but she wants security and to know where they stand in this “relationship” It’s okay for a female to lay down some ground work instead of asking a confused guy to define the relationship. It’s also okay for a female to have her voice be heard and if the guy can’t respect her then why continue. This was yet another sign that there's still a lot of work to be done especially when she told me that she believed I would be honest with her if she opened up some. We were strangers but because she opened up a little, I was honest with her. I'll never know if I helped any but I tried. As a tribute to all the younger ladies I wrote FOCUS
http://www.lulu.com/browse/preview.php?fCID=441817 Check it out

CONTROL

You know it’s too bad what he did to you,
all of the promises not kept followed by the pain he put you through…

I know you tried everything to prove how much you cared,
his mind was so messed up that true lies was all he shared…

Constant usage of threats never challenges in case you ever wanted to leave,
taking all the love you gave as hurt in return is what you receive…

Using every possible deceiving way to keep you isolated from your closest peers,
never consoling when you’re down and becoming angry at the sight of your tears…

Couldn’t hang out with the girls or trip out with the guys over the phone,
can’t walk away without understanding why wanting to Love is defined as the want to own…

Things finally come to an end and you two part with him running away with your Heart and leaving his emotional baggage...


Click the link below to see the entire poem
http://www.lulu.com/browse/preview.php?fCID=441817

A Woman, Interrupted...

Not to long ago I met a beautiful lady who from N.Y. at my job and after talking to her a few times, she opened up some and wanted to speak her mind openly and freely and that was cool with me. She (like most women on the planet) has had awful luck with guys (I wanna lean away from calling these people “MEN”. You’ll see as I continue LOL) and felt comfortable telling lil’ old me about something she was struggling to deal with. She had dated a guy and he cheated on her on top of lying, controlling, and manipulating her in the middle to make a long story short. Of course he played on her hopes of having a good MAN and everything he did to disrespect her was her fault. That is partially true b/c she allowed it to continue to the point of non repair and she ignored all the red flags – is what I told her. If the story holds true then they hadn’t really spoken for awhile and then outta the blue, she has gifts on her front porch during the holiday season from Guess WHO? This act made her consider getting back with him believe it or not but instead of telling her she’s foolish, stupid, gullible, and desperate, I simply listened to her and respected her for putting her thoughts on the table as opposed to imposing my will and thoughts on her. Since I’ve had this conversation billions of times before her, I felt confident that she would realize on her terms whata mistake she was making once we (TOGETHER) objectively reviewed what was on the table [figuratively]. After some mild drama and support from her friends she cut off all ties with this guy. During our talks I decided to send her something I wrote about this matter so that she would understand that a). She’s not alone and b). I’ve had this presented to me many times before. The title is simple – CONTROL

Where to begin

This is my first time starting a blog but I hope to get better as time goes on. I plan to express my thoughts, feelings, and share my insight on matters that are dear to me and many others that I have spoken to concerning matters dear to them. I am a writer and write about life and I also have my 1st of three books published and this year I plan to publish the second. That’ll help with what I hope to accomplish with this blog. Anyway, this blog will be used as an avenue to put whatever you wish on the table with only one condition, honesty. This is a key ingredient to the success of this experience. Now I don’t claim to know everything, I’m not a date doctor, and most importantly I’m not judgmental. What I am is a student of life and people and how we can learn how to interact better with each other on a civil and intellectual level.

I’ve had so many people gravitate to me and I have so many scenarios people have given me that I want to give back as much positive information as I can. This way I can become a better man, person, and a better writer and even though I feel very confident at this stage of my life, it isn’t over. I still have more to learn, room to grow, and become more complete, more well-rounded, a sharper listener. The better I can make myself will determine how good I will be for others and I believe that will help me understand my purpose. Better…